I Dreamed a Dream

Early Saturday morning, I had a dream.

No.

Not THAT dream.

But it was a wonderful dream, nonetheless.

I was in the most beautiful place...

...and I was surrounded by people I love.

(And YES, I have dream photos.

My blogging skills are THAT GOOD.

It's a gift, really. A gift that benefits all humanity.

So don't question it. Just sit back and enjoy the post.)

At first I thought that I was in heaven.

I tried to think back... had I let the branch talk me into riding on that blasted tube behind the boat? Had I passed on to that great singles branch in the sky?

I saw angels preparing the most delicious food...

... and comforting visions of those those," which I have loved long since, and lost a while." (name that hymn!)

Then President Jones appeared and the "heaven" theory got shot strait to heck.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that I don't think President Jones has a shot at heaven. Personally, I think his chances at exaltation are exceptionally good, no matter what the stake president says.

Its just that when he announced that he had only brought helmets for the people he loved, and I remained thoroughly helmetless, Heaven seemed like a pretty unlikely scenario.

That's when I slowly began to realize that I wasn't dead, I was dreaming.

And it was a good dream.

Sure, I was helmetless, but I was being chauffeured around the countryside by Princess Smooth-Ride McSpeedster herself. Who needs safety gear when you've got 4-wheeling royalty at the wheel?

I knew for certain that I was dreaming when the cowboys appeared.

My dreams always include cowboys.
Cowboys in jeans, hats, and chaps.

Yeeee Haaaaaaa!
It really was a good dream.

But, as with other dreams, things eventually started to get a little wacky.


Krystal turned into a raccoon, Lisa suddenly grew a uni brow, and Jill and Elizabeth stated looking a lot like lamanite women... lamanite women who co-own a tanning bed. At that point, I started wondering what I had eaten before bed to cause such disturbing images to haunt my dreams. I mean, I've heard of "dirty dreams" before, but this was just plain ridiculous.

I saw other strange things as well. Dreams can do that to you.

At one point, President Jones and Brother Hobson gave a mini class on mining techniques and homesteading laws.

I dreamed that their lecture was so persuasive, Lacie and Elizabeth decided to give up nursing and teaching (respectively) and stake a claim themselves.

We left the girls in their gold mine, and suddenly I was driving a 4-wheeler through the mud... WAIT A MINUTE. That can't be right.

Even in my wildest dreams I wouldn't be driving a 4-wheeler through the mud!
Hummmmm.......

Something is wrong here. Very wrong.

If I was really driving a 4-wheeler in my dream, there would be a whole lot of screaming going on....

Wait....

There we go!

Thanks Elizabeth.
That's much better.

I dreamed that we all took turns riding the 4-wheelers up and down the mountain and NOBODY was maimed or lost....



Well, some of us got a little bit lost, but that is to be expected in dreams, right?

The dream ended with Brother Hobson buying us lemonade from some little blond kids who magically materialized in the street. Random? Yes. But randomness in dreams can be oh so refreshing!

And then I woke up and immediately started to write down my dream in blog post format so that I wouldn't forget a single, fun-filled, dust-covered second of it.

And now that my dream has been recorded for posterity, it is time to turn my attention to decoding the symbolic messages and meanings hidden within my my dream... and de-manuring my not-so-symbolic poop splattered shoes.

Maybe, if I go to bed early tonight, I will dream of handsome chap-wearing cleaning cowboys and wake to cow-pie-free footwear.

A girl can dream, right?