This year's fair theme is "Country Pride County Wide," and unless the judges' integrity has been compromised, I think there is a blue ribbon in our future. Thanks Heidi and Tim!
1. And now behold, when the spring had sprung in
Cowtown, yeah, even when its rural scent had reached its bovine pinnacle, even
then did the stake Relief Society presidency begin to discuss the fair booth.
2. And they did say one to another, “Let us go out
into the wards and the branches of the stake where we might seek amongst the
sisters, even amongst the most crafty and creative of sisters, one who could
design for us a winning fair booth.”
1 3. And so the sisters of the stake Relief Society
did go out into the wards and branches of the stake, where they did seek a creatively
crafty genius sister who might design a fair booth that could deliver unto them
a blue ribbon.
2 4. For behold, they hath sought after blue ribbons
all the days of their presidency.
1 5. But after days of searching, the stake sisters
had still not found a sister to design the fair booth.
2 6. For all of the creatively crafty genius sisters
had also seen and smelled the signs of spring in Cowtown. And they did take
these signs and smells into their hearts and did realize that the time of the
assigning of the designing of the fair booth was at hand.
3 7. And knowing these things, the creatively crafty
genius sisters of the stake did hide themselves from the stake Relief Society
presidency.
4 8. Yeah, when the crafty sisters did see the stake
sisters approach, some did suddenly remember important dentist appointments and
did flee with great haste.
5 9. And other sisters did find places within the
ward and branch buildings to hide themselves; some diving behind couches while
others sought refuge in the sticky and smelly domain of the nursery classes.
1 10. But despite the great amounts of running and
hiding their presence did inspire, the stake leaders did continue to search and
to ponder and to pray to find a sister who might be persuaded or bribed or
compelled to design a fair booth.
1 11. In that same stake, in the ward named Eleven,
there dwelt a sister called Heidi who was known throughout the land as one of
the most creatively crafty genius sisters in the stake, yeah, even in the whole
valley.
2 12. And Sister Heidi, having been recently released
as a ward Relief Society president, was weary, yeah, even so weary that when
the stake sisters did appear unto her, she was unable to outrun them.
3 13. And when Heidi, in her post-president weariness,
had been thusly cornered, did the stake sisters invite her to design a fair
booth, even a fair booth of such awesomeness that it would kick the trash of
the fair booths of the other stakes, albeit in a charitable way.
1 14. And upon receiving this invitation did Heidi
exclaim, “Behold! Rememberst thou not that thou hast sought my help with the
fair booth previously? Yeah, even in the first year of thy service in the stake
didst thou seek me out and invite me to design thy first booth. But I could
not, for in that same summer did I have surgery.”
2 15. And the sisters of the stake did remember that
they had forgotten this thing.
16. And Heidi continued, “Yeah, when thou didst ask
me and I could not, I did know then that my escape would be but temporary. And
for these many years I did know deep in my heart that someday thou wouldst
return and the fair booth would be thrust upon me.”
17. “And having carried this truth with me these
many years, and not having the foresight to schedule another surgery for this
summer, I will design the fair booth of
the stake.”
18. And from that day did Heidi go forth and, with
her construction-oriented husband Tim the Tool Man, did design a fair booth for
the stake.
19. And for weeks did Heidi and Tim cut and glue and
paint, yeah so many cans of spray paint did Heidi wield that her hand did cramp
and her fingers did freeze, and her brain grew fuzzy with fumes.
20. And when the day appointed unto the setting up
of the booth did arrive, the sisters of the stake Relief Society did meet Heidi
and Tim at the fairgrounds. And at the fairgrounds did Heidi and Tim unveil the
fruits of their great labors.
21. And as the sisters of the stake did gaze upon
those great labors, they were struck speechless.
22. For behold, Heidi had built a railroad bridge,
and a mountain, and a turn of the century Relief Society building.
23. But this is not all.
24. For Heidi and Tim had also build an airplane, AN
AIRPLANE, that they did hang from the ceiling above the booth. AN AIRPLANE!
25. And when the stake sisters did regain their
powers of speech, they did prostrate themselves at the feet of Heidi, and also
of her husband Tim, and they did thank them for their sharing of their time and
their talents, and for the huge amounts of work they did do, and of fumes they
did inhale.
26. And the designers of the booths for the other
stakes did look upon Heidi’s booth and despair. For they beheld the blinding awesomeness
of Heidi’s booth and did know that their they had been beaten, albeit in a very
charitable way. And they did marvel at the way that had been so thoroughly yet charitably defeated.
27. And when the construction of the booth was
complete, when the mountain had been moved and the airplane had taken flight,
then Heidi, a truly creative crafty genius, and her husband Tim the Tool Man,
did leave the fair grounds.
28. And they did take their journey back to their
home, were they did attempt to rest.
29. For behold, they knew that they must get much
rest if they were to have any hope of out running the stake leaders in the
coming year.
30. And just to be safe, both Heidi and Tim did
decide to schedule surgeries for next summer.
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