Fair Week!!!

In case you hadn't heard, the most important event of the summer is taking place right now.

Life long dreams are being realized, new records are being set, and the attention of the entire planet is focused on one corner of the world. That's right...It is fair week!

Oh, and the Olympics are happening too, I guess. Like anyone cares about that.

The county fair is a really big deal here in my little valley. Things just kind of shut down for five days so the populace can focus on 4-H projects, rodeos, and maple bars. Here is my friend Danielle performing one of her many rodeo queen duties...leading the Fair and Rodeo Parade.

The parade was a very impressive collection of floats, classic cars (and tractors), horses, and skill demonstrations. Here is Taekwondo Master/Branch Presidency Counselor Josh (he is the one in black in the middle) showing off his deadly moves. I think our branch home teaching stats would really shoot up if he demonstrated breaking boards with his hands during Elders Quorum.
Back at the fair grounds, people crammed into the stadium seats to watch the team sorting event. The rodeo starts tomorrow which means one thing...Laundry time! I have been saving up laundry for weeks in anticipation of sharing the laundromat with the rodeo boys. I've said it before and I'll say it again...there is something about the sight of a wandering cowboy sorting out his whites from his colors that makes me very, very happy. Viva La Wranglers!
I was much more excited about the fair this year than I was in years past because, since being paroled, I mean released from the relief society presidency, I didn't have to help set up the stake handicraft booth, or beg/threaten people to fill our branch assignment as handicraft building security personnel.
My favorite part of the fair is looking at all the 4-H projects, including the winning sugar beet entries.

After my beet hoeing post wherein I described mature sugar beets by saying..."if a turnip and a pineapple had an albino love-child, it would look a lot like a sugar beet," my sister insisted I post actual photos so... here is the grand prize winner....
After gazing at this year's crop for a few minutes, I decided that a better description might be...sugar beets look like those creepy mandrake root thingys from Harry Potter...
Remember them....
Awfully similar, right?
Of course, a county fair wouldn't be a county fair without food...lots and lots of delicious food. It was our branch's turn to work our stake's burger stand tonight. Here are the cute Hobsons, before starting their shift, sharing dessert...pie ala mode with two spoons! If the menu would have offered milkshakes, they totally would have done the two straw thing. They are that cute. Really.

And speaking of cute, here is Marilyn showing off her apron and her waitressing skills. Her perkiness and ability to do basic math in her head earned her a spot up front. Believe me, you have no idea what "service with a smile" really means until you have ordered a fair special with fries from Marilyn. Brothers Barker and McMurry were our burger cooks. I really think they should get celestial kingdom fast passes for the hours they spent over that hot grill.
Zealanda and I worked behind the scenes...she cut produce and dressed burgers and I was the fry girl.
Notice I said "fry girl" and not "fry woman." That is because Lacie was the truly mature hot oil diva. She worked those baskets like concert pianist works a Steinway. It was an extremely inspirational sight.


It is a little know fact that, before my distinguished careers as a teacher, reporter, and cemetery lawn care technician, my dream was to work in the fast food industry. After three hours in an apron it became painfully apparent, however, that getting a college education was the wiser choice. It became painfully apparent when I burned my arm on the blasted fry thingy.

"Owwwww!!!! My arm! My poor arm! The pain! The horrible, horrible pain! How will I ever..."
"...Hey is that cash?!? Cool." Being a public school teacher, I am easily distracted...especially by things I don't see very often, like gorillas trained in classical ballet and wads of cash in my immediate vicinity.
Luckily, my injury happened at the end of my shift, so I was soon free to tend to my wound by sampling a wide variety of fair food.
Turns out, the burn itself wasn't all that bad. A little Neosporin and I was good to go. Unfortunately, I had put so much ice on it that I came down with a nasty case of frostbite and had to have my arm amputated anyway...just kidding Sister Barker!

Not that I really need two arms anyway. I can eat cotton candy just fine with one, so really...what else matters?