Spring Break Report, Part 4 : Here and There, or THE END

To wrap up my very long and drawn-out spring break report, I thought I would take a little bit of time to sum up the differences between Memphis and my little piece of heaven here in the valley.

First of all, it was a tad bit warmer in Memphis.

How much is a "tad bit?"

Well, let's just say Memphis didn't get any snow that week and leave it at that.

There was still a lot of teaching going on, but I got to listen to the teaching instead of doing the teaching. It was strangely satisfying.

I definitely noticed a difference in how homes were decorated.

I came home with a great decor theme for my guest bed room. It's gonna be good.

Another difference, the kidlets weren't kidlets.

They were actual "kids".

And there was a lot of them. So many, in fact, that by the second day I had given up on trying to learn all of their names. I decided just to call them all Fred. Fred didn't seem to mind. Fred was a really good sport that way.

What's the difference between my kidlets and actual "kids" like Fred?

Well, "kids" smell a bit better.

Oh, and they are taller.

(Above: [Left to right] Fred, Fred, Fred, and Me)

Taller... but just as dorky.

Maybe even dorkier.

Yep. Definatly dorkier. Oh, and the traffic? It was a bit more intense.

In summary, Memphis was different in a lot of fun ways and I saw many things that I am pretty sure I would never have seen otherwise.

Thanks Elizabeth and Freds. It was a blast.

Spring Break Report, Part 3

Even though the orchestra's jaunt to Memphis was during spring break, it wasn't really a "Spring Break" kind of trip. There were no beaches , pools, tank-tops, drink-runs, or slurred conversations with bike cops.

Wait... I guess none of those things really have anything to do with the spring breaks 'round these parts. What I should have typed was: It wasn't really a "Spring Break" kind of trip. There were no random snowstorms, 4-H piglet purchases, pre-planting tractor tune-ups, or quick post-office runs to pick up this year's mail-order chicks.

This trip was educational, very educational, for everyone involved. The kids learned something everywhere we went. For example, our first night we attended a symphony concert at the University of Memphis where the kids learned that Elizabeth wasn't just kidding around all these years when she told them that dynamics really do make a piece sound better.

They even learned stuff in non-educational locations, like the Wolfchase Galleria. Considering their county doesn't have a mall and that the closest thing the neighboring county has to a mall is two clothing shops, a dollar store, and a dialysis center that share a parking lot, the sight of a giant, two-level mall was a life-altering experience. I thought we were going to have to give them oxygen.

Part 3: Educational Experiences

Tennessee was a whole new world for our little group. The kids spent the first day trying to figure out what on earth a "Piggly-Wiggly" is. The chaperons spent the first day trying to figure out if our bus driver was drunk. Turns out, he was just really, really southern.

On our first full day in Memphis, our orchestra kids had an "exchange" with a local high school orchestra. They took turns playing some beautiful, fancy-schmancy pieces for each other, then played "Purple Haze" and a Lady Gaga medley together. We had a blast.

But amidst all of the blast-having, some knowledge-gaining was also taking place. The kids learned that not all high schools are built adjacent to fields and/or livestock (Gasp!) . They also learned that not all school restrooms have doors (Double Gasp!) , and that some kids NEVER drive their tractor to school. Not even on FFA Appreciation Day (Too shocked to even half-gasp!) . We also spent a few hours at Graceland that day, where the chaperons learned that if we all stand at the back of a tour bus line, we end up waiting for a second bus while the kids end up across the street and touring Elvis's mansion without any adult supervision.

The kids' matching orchestra shirts caught the attention of an Elvis.com camera crew who wanted to interview them. That is when the kids learned that, just because you are being interviewed on camera, you don't have to tell the truth. (Well, sir, I have loved Elvis all my life. He is the reason I even started taking music lessons in the first place. I might even name my first born kid Elvis. And my Grand Champion 4-H steer? I named him Priscilla.)

Over the course of the trip, the kids also learned that there is a reason there are several industries and an entire lifestyle built around southern cooking.

Of course, they also learned that there is no such thing as "fry sauce" in the south. Once they got over the shock, a few of them dedicated the reminder of their trip to spreading the fry sauce doctrine across Tennessee. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. These kids left a lot of confused/grossed-out waitresses, tour guides, college orchestra members, and TSA officers in their wake. And the falafel vendor outside of Nashville... that poor man is nover going to be the same.

We spent a couple of hours on world-famous Beale Street, where the kids learned that jello shots weren't the things they grew up eating at Primary activities . They also learned that, even though they weren't old enough to go inside Coyote Ugly, they could still get a pretty good view by pressing their faces up against the little window in the door. One of the most educational stops on our tour was St. Jude's Children's Hospital, where we all learned just how stinkin' blessed we are.

At the putt-putt fun center, the kids learned that go-karts corner better than tractors and the chaperone's learned why some of those kids will never, ever, EVER get a driver's license.

And then there was the Laser Tag Arena. Oh dear. That is where the kids learned that, even though their orchestra teacher loves and adores them, she has no problem whatsoever with lining their cute little faces up in the cross hairs of a large gun and pulling the trigger. (I believe her exact words when handed her weapon were, "Where are they? Let me at 'em!")

And speaking of their orchestra director, she learned a lot from this trip too. For example, she learned that it really does take two years of fund raising, planning, organizing, and stressing to make a trip like this happen.

While we were there, she learned that her students are even sweeter and smarter than she thought they were.

She also learned that it takes a lot of ice to help her feet recover from a day of chasing those sweet smarties around a big city.

And when the last of the kids drove away from the high school parking lot on Friday at 1:35 a.m., Elizabeth learned the true meaning of the words "bliss", "stress-free", "unconcerned", and "no longer legally or morally responsible for 28 teenagers on a spring break trip". Congrats on a job well done, Elizabeth! You have earned a week off... next March. You can make it till then, right? Good news! Only one more Spring Break Report left! Stay tuned for Part 4: Miss H's Favorite Shots and Final Thoughts.

Spring Break Report Parts 1 & 2

We're baaaack! And by "We", I mean Elizabeth, myself, five parent chaperones, and all 28 high school orchestra students who spent the last four days in Memphis.

That's right folks, we didn't lose a single kid. Not a one! Sure, cell phones might have been left on planes and ear rings may have been left on buses, but all of the kids made it back to Rupert last night, so we are counting the trip as a total success.

Even though we were only there for a few days, we managed to do and see a lot. For example, we spent some time on the banks of the Mississippi River... and not a single kid fell or jumped in! We met with researchers at St. Judes... where all of the questions the kids asked were intelligent and appropriate.

We visited the Civil Rights Museum... and not a single kid asked which door was the one where Martin Luther nailed up his paper about not buying your way into heaven.
We spent a lot of time listening to and creating beautiful music... all made by actual instruments instead of with armpits and/or various body parts expelling gasses.

We explored Beale Street... without the kids asking too many questions about some of the menu items posted on windows.
We visited a huge mall, experienced real southern cooking, and played laser tag... all without serious injury.

Oh, and we also spent a morning at a quaint little place called Graceland.

Our four days were so jam-packed, there is no way that a single post could contain all of the southern-fried goodness of our trip. Instead, I am putting together a few semi-massive posts about walking in Memphis.

Lets start with...

Part 1: Getting to Memphis

Our trip started out in the high school orchestra room at 11:00 Sunday night, where the kids practiced the pick-up lines that they were planning to use during the much anticipated giant mall excursion (for example: You must be from Tennessee 'cuase you are the only "ten" I see.)

Our plane was supposed to leave Salt Lake City at 6 a.m., which meant that our bus needed to be on the freeway hours earlier. The kids were too excited to do any sleeping on the drive down. They had been working towards this trip for two years, and they were bound and determined to enjoy every single minute of it.

Thanks to roads free of snow and traffic, we made it to the airport early...

... a bit too early. We had to wait for about an hour and a half for the airline folks to show up, but the kids didn't mind too much. They played Uno while the kids who had flown before passed on their wisdom to the kids who were new to the flight experience.

After three hours on a bus, three and a half hours in the airport, and four and a half hours on a plane, we touched down in Nashville. I thought that, since most of them had been awake for thirty hours or so, they would sleep on the bus during the three hour drive to Memphis.

But I was wrong.

So very, very wrong.

Instead, they talked and they sang and they practiced their southern accents. After the bus ride, there was dinner at an amazing BBQ place and a concert at the University of Memphis. Then there was the excitement of a hotel with...wait for it... an elevator AND vending machines. The kids drank it all in until late that night, which leads us to our next segment...

Part 2: Sleeping in Memphis

But the orchestra kids weren't the only folks in need of random naps. Even orchestra directors need a rest every now and then. And she earned it. Trust me.
Up Next: This was a school trip, so education was the number one priority. Stay tuned for what the kids learned... compared to what the chaperones learned.

Walking in Memphis... With 30 High School Students From Rural South Central Idaho

This is Elizabeth. When Elizabeth isn't busy with her high-altitude-mountain-disco hobby, she is the Orchestra Director/Teacher/Advisor/Mentor/Tuner/String-fixer for the school district across the river. Elizabeth has spent the last two years planning and fund-raising for an orchestra trip to Tennessee. This is Ratha, Elizabeth's handsome hubby. Ratha doesn't get to go to Tennessee because his job doesn't come with a built-in Spring Break. But don't feel too bad for Ratha. His job also doesn't come with an entire state legislature spending massive amounts of time and energy trying to figure out how to make him feel worthless and vilified. Spring Break or not, Ratha is doing pretty well.

This is Chloe, Elizabeth's bat-eared-rat-dog. Usually, when Elizabeth and Ratha leave town, I am the designated puppy-sitter.

And this is Me. And Elizabeth. And we match. On purpose. For a Relief Society mother/daughter activity (FYI, I was playing the part of "daughter", while Liz played the role of "young, trophy-wife step-mother "). Because Elizabeth's permanent roommate/travel buddy couldn't come to Tennessee, I was promoted from dog-sitter to chaperon. So now, instead of walking Chloe around on a leash for four days, begging her to piddle under trees in parks, I will be walking 30 high school kids around for four days, begging them NOT to piddle under trees in parks. That is, of course, assuming that Tennessee has laws prohibiting public piddling, which I am pretty sure they do... at least in the nicer parks.

I have never been to Tennessee before, so I am pretty excited.

I have also never chaperoned a high school trip before, so I am pretty nervous too. After all, high school means actual "kids" instead of "kidlets". Kids and kidlets are two very different species. We're talking Disney Channel vs. MTV, Justin Bieber vs. Lady Gaga, Mt. Dew vs. Red Bull.

Thankfully, these particular high school kids are from Rupert (Town Motto: It could be worse. At least we're not from Paul) , Paul (Town Motto: Proudly wearing the same styles since 1982) and Acequia (Town Motto: Now with indoor plumbing!) These kids are more CMT than MTV, and the only Red Bull they care about is the one they draw to ride in the high school rodeo tournament.

Plus, they are orchestra students, so ... well ... you know. It's not like I'm taking the football team to Vegas.

Still, I think I would be a bit less nervous if leashes were going to be involved in the chaperoning process, but Elizabeth forgot to write a leash-clause into the permission slip so cell phone checks and tape across hotel doors will have to suffice.

Next weekend, if all goes well, you will be reading about my many Memphis adventures on this blog. If all doesn't go well, you will probably be reading about my many Memphis adventures on CNN.com.

Lets all hope for the blog, shall we? Wish us luck! Tennessee here we come!

Finally... The 8th Grade DWA

Sorry for the delay in the DWA. It has been a crazy couple weeks, but here are responses of the older and wiser junior high kidets. The 8th graders DWA prompt was something about winning a trip to the moon and the three things that they would chose to take with them on such a trip. I have divided the best comments into categories for your reading enjoyment.

Deep Thoughts… for 8th Graders

Today I have been informed that I have won a trip to the, moon. However, I have also been told that because of budget restrictions, I can only bring three things with me. Budget restrictions kind of suck.

I would take my friend. She took me snowmobiling once, and a trip to the moon would totally top that.

I would bring lots of soda. Sure it is bad for your body, but it is so good for your tongue.

Practical Packing

I would bring a smart person so I could talk to them and so they could fix stuff.

I would bring my ipod. I would have said my phone, but I don’t think I’d get service up there.

I would bring my family so I would have people to talk to, NASA so they could fix anything that breaks, and Costco because they have really nice bathrooms.

I would bring a precooked, pre-seasoned steak, a fork, and some floss… besides eating the steak, the fork could come in handy if you got bored because, if you really wanted to, you could use it to rake the moon.

I thought about bringing a phone so I could call for pizza, but I doubt it would be warm and the delivery price would be costly.

Finally, I would take my extra coverage that girls need in case my monthly present comes.

I would bring popcorn to cook over the solar flares. Of course, the solar flares might also cook me, but I’ll probably be fine.

I would take gun. If aliens tried to steal my brain and harvest my organs, I want to be prepared.

I would bring my bed so I could hide under it during meteor showers.

One darling kidlet realized they had forgotten something important as they wrote their conclusion: Finally I am ready to go. We blast off. Suddenly, I feel a chill. Uh oh. I forgot my clothes. Can anyone hear me scream in space?

I would bring clothes, otherwise there would be a full moon on the moon.

Unique Choices

I would bring a trampoline. Just imagine all of the tricks possible when you can jump 8 times higher than normal!

I would bring a Michael Jackson tutorial. What better place to learn to moonwalk than on the moon?

I would take my dog because it would really freak her out when she got to space and started to float.

I would bring my pet goat, Steven, so I would have fresh cheese and milk. Plus, Steven can throw some rockin’ parties. I would also bring my mom so, if I die up there, someone will be there to take care of Steven.

And Speaking of Moms…
I would bring my mom so the cooking will be good. But then I would still need to bring someone to hand out with...

Inside the Minds of 8th Grade Boys
(Note: My very first year at the junior high, I made three observations about 8th grade boys that have proven true every year since. 1) 95% of 8th grade boys smell bad 2) 5% of 8th grade boys smell REALLY bad and 3) 8th grade boys find girls way too fascinating.)

I first, I would take Selena Gomez without even thinking about it. We would walk around and she could sing me some of her songs. Oh, also she would regret about going out with Justin Bieber. I would also let Selena bring a friend. It would be Taylor Swift.

I would bring Taylor Swift, my IPod, and a flashlight.

My choices would be easy: Taylor Swift, my iPod, and a video camera.

I would take a girl. One who was good looking, but not in my family.

I would bring my girlfriend, a video camera, and a chiropractor.

I would bring my girlfriend, so I could get to know her better.

I would take my girlfriend because, if I didn’t, I would never hear the end of it.

Inside the Minds of 8th Grade Girls
(Note: I thought it was very interesting that, while the 8th grade boys wanted to bring along their 8th grade girl friends, the 8th grade girls were more than happy to leave their 8th grade boyfriends at home)

Since I would have one more choice, I would have to choose between my love and my best friend. It’s a tough choice, but I’d go with my best friend.

If I could only bring one person with me I guess I could bring my boyfriend, but I think I would have more fun if I brought my best friend instead.

I won’t worry about bringing any special clothes because I’m pretty sure there won’t be any cute boys on the moon.

I would take my lip gloss just in case there is a stranded astronaut up there. I want to look my best and smell good to make a good first impression.

I would bring my friend Tessa. We do everything together, like when she cut off one of her eyebrows so I cut off one of mine too. You can conclude how our parents felt about this.

In other, non-8th-grader-related news, Spring break has arrived and I will be spending it in Tennessee chaperoning 30 high school orchestra students from the rival school district across the river.

So, now that I have won a trip to Memphis, what three things will I pack to take with me? Tune in next week to find out!

2011 DWA... Part I

About this same time last year, members of my state government (none of whom I voted for, by the way) decided to get rid of our state Direct Writing Assessment.



This was a bad idea for several reasons, including 1) it was the only statewide assessment that tested kids’ actual writing skills and 2) the resulting thousands of essays made for great blogging material.



It was a huge loss for everyone.

Thankfully, my school district leaders decided that this particular essay test was too important to trash, and organized our very own district DWA.



The kids wrote their essays two weeks ago, and on Tuesday nine English teachers met up for a day of grading at the district office.


After hours of reading essays, I am pleased to report that the 7th and 8th grade kidlets in my district wrote the heck out of their essays. Seriously, they aced it.


The teacher part of my brain was very proud of them, but the blogger side of my brain was a bit disappointed because…
1) The prompts were not historically based and therefore didn’t lend themselves to hilariously wrong, yet well-written answers.
2) With only a few hundred essays to grade instead of a few thousand, there just wasn’t the same wealth of blog-worthy material.


But I did find some great sharable thoughts from the 7th grade essays and a TON of good 8th grade stuff, so it looks like, thanks to my darling district, the DWA blogs will go on.


Today, lets begin with the 7th Grade DWA: We all have favorite objects that we care about and would not want to give up. Think of one object that is important or valuable to you. For example, it could be a book, a piece of clothing, a game, or any object that you care about. Write about your favorite object. Be sure to describe the object and explain why it is valuable or important to you.



I thought that the vast majority of the essays would be about cell phones. Turns out, while 7th graders do value their phones, the vast majority chose to write about their…wait for it…BLANKIES! That’s right. The 7th graders LOVE their blankies. Especially the blankies that were made by grandmas. How sweet is that?


Of course, there were several essays that sang the praises of cellular devices…

• My cell phone helps me feel safe… It is almost like a superhero in technology form.
  


• The phone that your parents buy you shows how much your parents love you. My parents love me more than a Rumor Touch, but less than an iphone.

Blankies and phones aren’t the only items that kids round these parts value. After reading her seventeenth essay on shotguns and/or rifles, the teacher next to me asked if she could dock points for graphic descriptions of hunting adventures. I told her it that I thought it would be safest to pass any kids who were armed and admitted to being good shots.
Here are some passages from two of my favorite “local flavor” essays …

• If a disaster happened to me and I only had time to grab one thing, that thing would be a sack of potatoes. There are many reasons for this. For instance, a sack of potatoes is food, you can sell potatoes for money, and you can use it as a pillow.

• The object that I care about immensely is my red BYU Idaho Cow-Tipping Team shirt. I like this shirt because it reminds me so much of our country here in Idaho, it makes people laugh, and it makes me feel like the red-neck that I am.What else do 7th graders in my valley value?
  
  
  
  • We all have objects that are important to us. I do, such as my house, my hair gel, and even my underwear.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  • The headband I got at New Beginnings is my favorite object… When they put it on my head it made me feel like I was being crowned princess of the ward.
    


• 
  

  My most important object is my knife… I brought my knife with me to scout camp. I earned my wood carving badge with it. I also managed to make myself bleed a lot with it.
  



• My most important object would be money… Without money, I’d have to dig in the garbage for food, sit by the road asking for money, and live in a cardboard box… My money keeps me from having to live in a box. I would get cold at night if I had to live in a box. I would also get taller, so the box would be too small for me. And I would also have to keep my box away from the other hobos. It would be like an MMA fight.

Many of the kidlets demonstrated wonderful word choice…

• 
  

  [My pillow] is one of the most versatile of all sleeping accessories.



• 
  

  Some favorite objects are rational, like shelter. Others are irrational, like a dirt bike. My favorite object is my brain. It controls blood flow, breathing, and a myriad of other uses.
  

Some kids didn’t really understand what the prompt meant by “object”…

• My dog is smart, ultra cute, and the most valuable thing in the Milky Way (the galaxy, not the candy bar).

• My mom is my most valuable object. She does my laundry so that I will have clean clothes and won’t smell like a dead cow.

Even though this writing prompt didn’t have anything to do with history, I was glad that I still found one essay with some historical inaccuracies…

• My most important object is the picture of my mom taken on her graduation. It has been in our family for generations… It was taken at her graduation in 1859.
  

My favorite essays had the most unique topics…

• The first reason I would save my ping pong table is because it is a peacemaker in my home… my brother and I pack up our angers and then unpack them on the ping pong table… The last but not least reason is that it keeps me and my friends out of trouble. You might ask yourself, “What do teens do on a Friday night?” In our modern world, they might go to the mall or to the movies where so many horrible things can happen to you. There’s drugs, pornography, awful things with girls, and so much more. Instead, you could be in an anti-sin basement eating pizza, playing ping pong, and having a good time.
  


• The last and most important reason why my retainer is the most important thing I own is because it keeps my self-esteem up. I need my self esteem to have the strength to say no to drugs, keep my grades up, and be the best I can be. My retainer keeps me pretty, thus raising my self esteem. Without my retainer, my self esteem would drop like a parachuter without a parachute. I would live a life of poverty and torment.

• Soap is important because it may help you get a job and allow you to find a girlfriend... Where would we be without soap? Our race would slowly wither away because we would live in separate houses trying to block out the stench. The world is a much better place with soap.
  

We ended up with two essays about one creative topic. One was flowery and poetic, the other was more straightforward…

• Ipods, cars, pets, beds, and family heirlooms, all make the world a better place, but just imagine a horrible, painful, outright disturbing world we would be stuck in without toilet paper. This is my most valuable object… A world without TP is a world of irritability… Without our toilet paper, humans would become prone to perpetual stench, disease, uncontrollable itching, and humiliation.

• My favorite object is toilet paper… Without toilet paper we would have to use pinecones or toilet sand paper. I don’t know about you, but I want soft paper to wipe my butt.
  

I hope you enjoyed the 7th grade essays. The 8th grade DWA post will be coming soon and, since those kidlets are not actually in my current classes, it was a lot more fun to find mockable stuff in their papers... although not as easy as it is to find mockable stuff in our state capitol.