Meeting Miracles

Our Stake Relief Society Meeting was held last night and, since we are still beginners at this whole stake Relief Society thing (we still have that great new-car smell! Really! Sniff us! We smell grrrrreat!) , we wanted it to be really special. We needed the sisters of the stake to know how much they are loved. We hoped to create a beautiful atmosphere where the sisters of the stake could be feed both physically and spiritually so they could return to their homes strengthened and ready to press forward as covenant keeping women of God. And because of our shiny and smelly newness, we needed help. We needed divine intervention. We needed a miracle worker. We needed...
... Diane Woodhouse! Dazzling, delightful, divine Diane. Titan of temple work, major league missionary, tenacious teacher, honorary Empress of Oakley, and the best party planner this side of Kolob. We handed the planing reigns to this designer of divine dinners and then just stood back and watched the miracles happen.

Miracle #1: Under Sister Woodhouses leadership, and with the help of many (mostly) willing helpers (thanks Zealanda!) , the stake center cultural hall was transformed from a space where smelly 14-year-olds play H.O.R.S.E. into...

... a space worthy of a royal wedding reception with a center table arrangement worthy of a temple celestial room.

Tulle, twinkle lights, and twenty works of art depicting the Savior made us forget all foul lines and foul-smelling deacons. The soul-touching beauty of the atmosphere she created made me rethink my long-held anti-reception, pro-elopement stance... for a whole five minutes (sorry Mom; you are still only going to get one weeks notice before a quick trip to the Twin Falls Temple with dinner to follow at the Golden Corral) .

Miracle #2: Brother Barker, one of the manliest manly men I have ever met, spent a good eight to nine minutes separating and arranging doilies. He even said the word "doilies", like, twenty times. I think that may have surpassed my surprise nomination as 2008-2009 teacher of the year and the birth of my adorably odd nephew Jonah as one of my top-five happiest life-experiences.

Miracle #3: My dear, sweet mother, dedicated pal Krystal, and I survived a cupcake near-catastrophe of cosmic proportions and managed to produce...

... 216 color-coordinated cupcakes that looked good enough to eat.

Miracle #4: Sister Hobson's brilliant prayer/advertising combo resulted in attendance at the meeting surpassing our hoped-for 160...

... to an unbelievable 230. We were shocked, delighted, amazed, and very happy that our nightmareish fears of having only ten people show up never came to pass.

Then, because of Miracle #4, we found ourselves in desperate need of:

Miracle #5: Food prepared for 190 people somehow fed 230. How miraculous was that? Well, I am currently writing an epic narrative poem to document the occasion. It is going to make the new 176 page new translation of Beowulf sound like a four-line Halmark Greeting Card.

All of these miracles, plus the celestial experience that was the program, were made possible because of many wonderful girls, women, ladies, and even a few lasses who used their time and talents to help make the night such a beautiful success (My mother's cupcake decorating skills and Church kitchen experience, Elizabeth and Co.'s prelude, Sister Barker and Cindy's musical number, Timbri's video, Krystal's cupcakes, Zealanda's decorating, Sister Hobson's introduction and heart-touching musical slide show, and, of course, the Jones' beautiful remarks.)

Oh, and there were manly miracle workers too. Brother Hobson split his time between helping with our meeting set-up and clean-up and setting up and helping to run his ward's youth conference. And Brother Woodhouse...well, his love and devotion to his wife and her many worthy endeavors will be the subject of a yet to be titled epic love poem.

And then there was Ratha, who selflessly left the comfort of his home to procure nourishing morsels for the poor, starving, somewhat unwashed masses of children inhabiting the nursery.

And who could forget the countless miracles wrought by our high counselor, Brother Hinckley. I tried to get a photo of him, but he was moving so fast setting up sound systems, fixing video feeds, serving food, refilling water glasses while single-handedly saving kittens and grandmas from terrorists and rewriting the heath care bill to make it understandable and functional that all of the photos were nothing but a blurr. But the photo below is a pretty darn close visual representation of how we feel about him. Oh, and did I mention that Brother Barker totally rocked the doily scene? Cause he did. He is the king of perfect table settings. His crown is in the mail. Miracle #6: The whole Stake Relief Society Presidency survived! Including our "other counselors" Diane, Bonnie, and Kristi.

Of course, that "new presidency" smell has been replaced by the sweet smell of a successful event... mixed with the distinct musk of summer-time exhaustion.

Flash Forward to 24 hours later: I was sitting in Panda Express in IF, waxing poetic about the events of the previous night, when my mother cracked open her fortune cookie to reveal...So..........does anybody have any ideas for next year's meeting?